A difficult decision!

i think i never mentioned this in my blog before, but some ppl at my youth group and me where going to the WYD (World Youth Day) that is going to be next august in Germany. Initially i though i was going with them, and for the whole year i thought that it was going to help me renew my own experience with God, and maybe it would be a great experience. This trip will be for around three weeks.

Also, for these end of year i have a shot to qualify to the Costa Rican team for the Iberoamerican Math Olympics. Which means that if i qualify i'll be heading to Cartagena Colombia for two weeks in mid september.

This two trips had me both happy and full of fear. Both mean a lot to me, and i really like both ideas, however the chance that both can happen at the same time is completely freaking me out. 'Cause having both will mean to lose almost month and a half of my second semester in college, which will mean that i'll be losing almost every course. And i know i wouldn't be happy of leaving my studies aside that way. And maybe the Math Olympics are just one shot and everything... i don't even know wheater i will qualify or not but i want to give my best and qualify. I just have one more shot in this field and i am not intending to lose it. That's why... in my own fear of making both trips i chose the selfish one, i won't go to Germany, i won't go to find God... and i feel terrible, but i want to fullfill one of my biggest dreams, i want to feel that i'm really good at something, that i can be the best, or at least among the best of the world in something.. and this is my shot...

So from now on... i'll put my effort in going to Colombia... with the power of my mind... i'll do my best... cause i'm not going to Germany, just to fullfill this one dream. And i'll be in the next congress for catholic youth... i promise that to myself... cause i need to thank God for everything he has given me....

≈i≈